My, My, My God said No today! Today started off like the rest this week and I couldn't shake it! I was starting to feel hopeless. I am fighting so hard for happiness that I'm exhausted! Mentally, spiritually, physically I was done! I even said I quit. Why?!? I felt devalued! I felt like all these trials and tribulations, heartbreaks and devastation has left me unvaluable. I'm tainted goods; the daughter that had all the potential, the mom that is always feeling like she's not good enough, the wife that used to have "it", and the friend that always got something going on. A HOT MESS! I felt that all on the inside this morning; I even quit today y'all. I just couldn't stand it anymore.
God made me a Fighter! I asked him this morning when I was in the lowest of lows for guidance. I asked why? Why can't my journey be easy? Why am I always fighting for the simplest things? I asked him to show me that I'm on the right path. That I didn't make this movement up! This is helping people right? I didn't feel like me or my journey mattered. I felt like EVERYTHING IN MY LIFE WAS SAYING NO!
But God didn't! This is not your breaking point Shantrael, this is the making of greatness! Manifestation at it's finest! I had to be reminded that this is but a moment in time! I am everything I need to be in this moment and so are you! My Ram in the bush arrived in several ways today! My mom poured everything she had into my spirit this morning. Darryl reminded me that we are in this to complete this mission together no matter what! My care team reminded me that "I ROCK"! My Grandfather sent me the most beautiful flowers and reminded me that the way my FAITH is built I have no choice but to get through! Just like that GOD turned it around! Unvaluable, tuh TRY INVALUABLE!
I AM ENOUGH! So are you! The importance of having a tribe of people praying for you when you can't pray for yourself is a blessing. So many of you have blessed me this past week and I can't thank you enough! Books, encouraging words, hugs, prayers, love and laughter, flowers! I've regrouped and put my invisible superhero cape on and I am ready to continue this fight! Mama, stop worrying; you've equipped me with everything you had to get me here and I will continue to be strong, brave and rooted!